What I wish I knew when planning my wedding

 

I got married at 22 years old in the same church my mom and dad were married in. Cute right. When I was planning my wedding, Pinterest was just beginning to be a thing, and I did not have 6 years of pins to look through for ‘inspo’ when choosing center pieces or cake toppers.

So needless to say I had wayyyy fewer ideas running around about how things should flow through the day.

Today I’m listing my top three things I wish someone would have told me about planning a wedding and hopefully this will help you avoid some wedding-day-don’ts that I stumbled upon.

 

1) Give plenty of time to RSVP

My husband Pascal is from Switzerland, and besides being the wonderful kind man he is, he is also quite private. So as our long-distance relationship was getting more and more serious and we decided to actually get married, he kept it to himself until I was there in person to propose. While that was INCREDIBLY adorable (because online proposals are just not the sameee), it left his family with only 7 months to book a transatlantic trip.

We were so lucky that his Mother, Father, and sister were all able to make our what we learned was a last-minute event, but the rest of his extended family had other commitments, mainly work, and could not come.

So if you are so in love that you’ve forgotten how vacation time works like I was, give them a year to plan their trip and attend your big day, because 7 months is just not enough.

 

2) Hire professionals.

I planned my entire wedding on a budget of about $4200. Basic Breakdown- $1000 Dress, $600 church rental, $2000 caterer, $600 flowers and décor. That left $0 for a photographer. I remember buying her a starbucks gift card as a thank-you and feeling I’d done my part. Looking back though, I do wish I had done my research and hired a photographer with experience. I was young and I went with someone who would do it for free, and while she gave it her best, I was not thrilled with my images and see the irony almost 10 years later being a wedding photographer and wishing people would invest in their memories. This is not just for photographers, but many services are just too important to go with a cousins sister’s brothers girlfriend.

I wasn’t sure how I felt sharing images of my wedding while also saying that they were not what I was hoping for, but ultimately, I’m not bashing the photographer, I’m recommending that you look for one that fits with you. These are the images I have and looking back on them still makes me happy even though if I did it again I would do more research and invest in someone who I connected with and trusted with my day.

Whether it’s a photographer, wedding planner, caterer, or florist, put in the time to find people who click with youfor the day and invest in your vision, so that you don’t have to look back and wish things had been different.

 

3) Break the rules.

One of my biggest issues with our day is that looking back at it, I just did what I thought I was supposed to do and didn’t really think what most accurately represented Pascal and I. I wish I would have asked the people I look up to and think are totally cool what kind of things they did at their weddings, and then kept the ideas I liked and made no excuses for the ones that were not me. I wish we would have asked specific people to make speeches. I wish I would have remembered when dinner was supposed to start so I didn’t have to hide in the basement waiting for guests to show up. I wish we had incorporated more of our long-distance love story, and how we both love to travel into our day. I have no regrets marrying my best friend, but I’m definitely the person who plans a 10 year renewal just to throw the party I always wanted.

If you want something at your wedding, remember you wont get it if you dont plan for it. You are not breaking any rules by serving dessert first, giving everyone a goldfish to take home, or serving breakfast for dinner. Be you babe. That’s what you are going to look back on and love the most.

(but totally treat the goldfish kindly)

Thats it friends. Do you. Have fun, and remember it’s your party, so go ahead and eat cake first, dance to cotton eyed joe, and celebrate in style.